18 April

My fault?

Yeah. Whatever. Who cares? If I'm sick, I'll take care of my own medicine. So whats the big deal now. I have not asked you to send me to sch on a freaking heavy raining day, have I? Then what are you making a fuss about?! You told me to use an umbrella and when I wanted to use the small one, you forbid me. Why th fuck did you ask me to use an umbrella? And you got so fucking worked up just because I did not use an umbrella to sch? I can still study even if I'm wet ok?! Seriously. Whatever. Fuck everything. I should just diee.

Bitches On Alert. FORME.

Been a while since I wrote to you. The only place I can actually confide the real thing I feel. Recently, theres been so many 'bitches' bothering a big lot of my life. I don't get why they're just there, watching my every move, when they actually hate me. Sometimes I feel like I'm too cool that they gave me 110% attention of their lives to me. Hahahahha. But again, when it comes to rumours and shits about me that they clearly don't know, it becomes annoying and hateful. The pain. In the heart. Is more than. Excrutiating. Yes. I'm sure loads of is victims feel the same way when people they don't know starts to talk bullshit about them. I kinda feel bothered with these people. And tbh, I even feel annoyed with their existence around me, especially when they're being an attention seeker or a hypocrite towards me. Ewww please. Can you be more.... Plastic? Hahahahah. Frankly speaking, I don't really respond to these people. Most of the time, I didn't even answer their question. And it feels likeabossss. Hahahahah. Aigoooo. Let's just have a part two tmr, shall we?? Eyes are hurting. Having sore eyes. Byebye :)

Annoyed

Do u know the feeling when people told u strongly that u have to stidy hard and ace ur subs but in the very end, they're the ones stopping u from success?? I always felt that. I felt like theres no point telling me to do well when at the moment im trying very hard to get the marks, they stop me from doing so. Wtf? I loss i whole lot of CIP last yr because of these peoples mistake. And when im trying to cover it up while my friends get more than i do, THESE people are the ones stopping me. Might as well just tell me stop sch right?? I dont understand what they're thinking. They dont understand the system and freaking expect me to ace my studies with no point helping. Think im a geniuss?!?!?! FML!

The Beach

Went to Desaru Beach yest with my sis fam and my bro-in-law's bro's fam. It was fun. But again not so fun. I want my mum. I really want my mum. I miss her. I miss home. I miss dad. I miss sch. I miss everything. So much. Ever since then, i've been feelin so messed up, so unorganized. All i wanna do is cry. I dont know why. Honestly, i think all i want is to go home...

Birthday!

16 Dec. My birthday. Well it IS a nice day. It should be. Celebrated in Msia this yr. For the celebration, my bro-in-law bought KFC for all of us, for me :D After lunch, we went to TESCO to find my bday cake. I chose yummy Choc Mousse when I actually want Angry Birds :P Aft that, we walked ard and the kids, my nephews and niece, went to look for bday gifts for me. Heheh. I got Pen Set with Keychain, Cat-Pendant Necklace and a table decor. Longgg before my bday, my sis and bro bought me a bball ball for my bday :P hehehe. I did have a nice bday. Still have 4 slices of cake remaining :D

Home, No Home

Mum and dad went back home in Singapore. Now, I have to stay here for almost 1month. I guess my hw and school preps wont be ready before school reopens. But no matter what i say, these people dont think the same way as me. Why? Cus they dont have anyone thay goes to sch now. Hais.

Depressed!

Ahhhh! We're gonna finally have some fun today. All of us are going to Ulu Tiram Waterpark. But..... Badluck for me! A thousand badlucks! I just cant stop thinking of it and thus thinking of it made me more depressed! I just dont know whatta do now! Ergh -.-

Holiday~

Now, Im at msia. Holiday-ing at my sis house. Gonna enjoy. Needa enjoy. Holidays are so bored nowadays :/ gonna go to the hotel and enjoy th cool water of th swimming pool. Looking forward to it :D

Upset

I dont kmow what to say. I dont know what to do. All but 1 thought left my mind. Death. Death is all I can think about. I simply wanna die. She hates me so much. I can never do anything right. Why should I still be living? I should just die, and go to hell. Well thats apparently where I'm going if I die now. I totally have no comments on how she treats me. I can mever say anything. Fml. I can just cry the hell out but it doesn't solve it. I don't feel any much pleased and relieved. I feel more fucked up than I was before. What can I do?! :'(

Apparently...

Well, who'd hate holidays? No one. Me neither. Holidays are th only time when u can spend ur time, sleeping, eating, go out with frens and many more. Apparently, it doesn't work like that for me. I kinda hate holidays now... Well, atleast if i dont get the freedom to go out with my friends, its ok to go out with my family. Now, my mum's not talking to me, i cant go out, i cant spend so much time on com... Dont mention abt HER bringing me out. I feel lika stranger, like im in a jail or smtg. I dont whats my fault, but im getting th vold sholder for no apparent reason. Its been days. I dont know... I literally hate holidays now. So much. I dont know how imma survive nxt yr, with no longer holiday. DIE.