I hate my fucking pathetic useless meaningless life.

I don't understand the reason of me being born, growing up and so called being a person. What the hell does it mean to be a growing person, a young adult, if all I do is restricted so badly? I'm waiting for my N level results, and we have up to 3 months of holidays. It's normal for us to go out and work during this period. the hell are you supposed to do at home for 3 freaking months? ROT? I'm not trusted, I'm not given just a little freaking freedom, and then I get blamed for everything. "Why can't you be like your sister?" "Why can't you open your mouth to ask for something?" "How can you succeed if this is how you do things?" "Why are you so afraid of people?" "What's the point of going to school if you always depend on your mum?". OKAY. Now, freaking tell me if going to work was a crime at my age, why a whole lot of students do it and they are not legally charged?? If I want to go and work but they kept saying no, WHEN can I stop depending on them? They are not letting me grow up independently but t hey expect me to be as independent as my sister that they clearly allowed to go to work at my age. Get why I hate my freaking life? How can you be so irrational and expect somebody to be like what you want them to be if you don't give them a chance??!! FUCK YOU.