2 years...

It's been awhile since I wrote. Well, same goes since I last spoke with Khidhir. Today, marks the 1st day in 2 years that we talked. It was normal. It was fine. But I know it will never be the same. He still gave me smileys and laughs, but he seemed......... distant. Very distant. Not that it matters. He became distant long ago. Its just that, it felt weirder cus its been awhile since we have a conversation and not a terrible fight. I missed him. But I couldn't let go what he did. I couldn't forgot how much of an asshole he was. It was nice talking to him again, but its just because I want us to be on talking terms again. I know we can't pick up from where we left off... or I'll hurt again. I legit loved him. But he doesn't. And I just dont know if I could trust him again. Anyways, apart from the invincible distance between us, he acted like how he used to before we broke up. He was nice and sweet and friendly and then poof! he became the cold asshole that I never knew. Does anyone know how that feels? Cus I can't explain it myself. It'd be nice if he decided to tell me how much he regretted treating me the way he did before... but I wouldn't know what to do. So I guess I 'll just leave him to be the way he is. Hmm.