It's finally happened.

So 1.5 months passed since my last post, and Jax has finally left for Basic training. When we first talked about it, he thought that he'd be gone for roughly around two months, then he'll come back home for a short while before leaving for AIT. However, while talking on the phone and discussing about it while planning some stuff for us, he found out that he wouldn't have a break between basic and AIT (cause he's dumb lol) and so, 2 months became something that's almost 6 months. 6 months of not talking to the idiot.. I have to say, it's been really hard.

It's only been slightly over a week now, but it's driving me nuts. I miss him a lot and I keep texting him, sending him memes that remind me of him, sending him selfies and videos. It's crazy hahaha I feel kind of extra, but yeah. I really wish we could've talked more before he left though...

So a week before he left, Jax got into a rather depressive state. He was barely online, he barely slept, barely ate. He kept getting these weird, bad dreams about various things, me included. I didn't know how to help him because while he was having his episodes, I was having mine too. I couldn't tell him that, but I couldn't figure out how to help him either because he wasn't opening up to me. Apparently, according to the man himself, he resorts to shut down and isolation whenever he's facing huge changes in life.

Well.. I guess I could understand that. I tried, at least. It put pressure on me, on him, on us. We had fights, disagreements, we even almost broke up. Despite that, we worked it out and he stepped out of his breakdown almost a week after. He spent as much time as he could with me in the last few days, even when he was busy meeting his family and friends. Even in the days that he was recoiling into his shell, he still checked up on me and never failed to remind me that he loves me.

All that aside, we got over a few things since we started dating and we have grown quite a bit together, but I mean it's still a fairly new relationship lol. We've made a few plans for ourselves, like meeting up and stuff, so we'll see how that goes. I would say that this would be my first long relationship in years though. I really hope it lasts, but again, we'll see how it goes when he comes back. He'd probably be able to use his phone after Basic, when he's transferring from the training base to training school. It'll be great if it that's the case, but if not, we'd be dating for 7-8 months by the time he returns lmao.

Alright, I guess that's all from me for now. I promise I'll update more frequently. I kept forgetting that I have this blog to spill my thoughts, and that's why my posts are so irregular. Anyway, I'll share more cute stuff in my next post and also one good news! See y'all soon 💖